In and out of Love

I'm trying to fall in love with writing again.


Because, lately I've been much more out than in. I'm pretty sure this is due to the many rejections that I've had and some long years of being THIS close, then SO far, then THIS close again (note to self: printing out a boatload of rejections in one day doesn't help one's mood and takes all your printer ink) (also note to self: what you already know- that this is part of the writer's life. sidebar: knowing this does not make the pain any less).

But the other night I dreamt of characters that I had put aside a long time ago. They were talking to me again. Living and breathing and moving about in my mind. Wheels were turning. This made me happy and at the same time quite nervous. Part of me wanted to tell them to just go away. What good would them bugging me do? Then a new idea came to me * poof* of another really good story. With twists and turns, love and romance. I could see it so clearly that I was smiling and laughing at the fun of it all and then once again with a wave of my hand I was wishing it away.

But they won't go away. They are still there. Forcing me to sketch out ideas and pushing me to do the painful work of coming up with some sort of plot. And then the more painful work of stringing together some sort of WORDS. Oh well, this is life. My life and mind and I just have to go with it. I will write because the stories want out and I want to get them out or I'll never get any rest.


So the files will be made. Where they go from there... I just don't know.

Photo fm Dabawenya

Best,
Kwana

I'm On A Horse

Thanks so much to all of you for your sweet birthday wishes to Nana yesterday. Since she's not on the Net at her place I will be printing the post out and sharing it with her this weekend when the family gets together to celebrate her birthday with good ol' card games. I'm bringing Pokeno. I know she'll be so thrilled to read all your comments.

As a thank you let's all smile at the Old Spice guy for a moment shall we? Folks can't stop talking about this commercial and it still gets me. So funny. Makes me want to buy soap on a rope.



Best,
Kwana

Happy Birthday Nana

What's Jack up to? Why he'll have extra pep in his step today because today is the birthday of his best girl...NANA!

Happy Birthday Nana!

Words cannot say how much we love you.

You are the best grandmother a person could ever ask for and the

best Nana in the world...to everyone!

Love,
Kwana, DH, DD,DS and
Jack

Snowzilla 2010

We had the storm of the millennium on Thursday pics of which you saw from Thursday night over here. Well, here is a little slideshow from Friday morning. This pictures were taken from my bedroom window (Jack and I had finished our walk and were done with the snow).

As you can see the DD did a small about of car clearing and then the call of the snow angles was just too hard to resist. I hope your March brings calmer weather. We've had enough of down trees and power outages thank you very much. And now today is by surprise another snow day so no school. *groan* Oh and the pink eye has flared up again *double groan*
No use complaining. It is what it is. Enjoy the show.

Best,
Kwana

Men Take Note.. again

Just in case you didn't get it the first time...



Best,
Kwana

Help When You Need It

What’s Jack up to? Jack is doing good. The silly little dog is having a day with the dear twins since is been officially called a snow day so the weekend begins early at my house. Enough with the snow please. I'm done.

And yes, this was a huge honking storm. Trees down and all that. My DH got stuck and his car couldn’t make it up the hill coming home last night. Thankfully he was in front of the town’s fire house and a bunch of young guys came out and pushed his car up the hill.
It’s so good to have help when you need it.
These pics were taken at night.


Then later when walking Jack late in the evening he saw a huge tree had fallen around the corner. Of course I had to go out and see. Down right on the power lines.


On our walk suddenly the big guns were out, this huge tractor. The driver was so funny. He pulled up beside us and said, “Did you call a cab?” Yep, Good to have help when you need it.

Speaking of help when you need it... Laura from Shore(house) Chic blog is doing a Help for Haiti auction over at her blog. Because they still need so much help and will for a long time to come. Laura has some wonderful handmade pieces to go to the highest bidder. Go here to check it out.

Best,
Kwana

It’s All About Me

Hey, sometimes it has to be all about me and sometimes it has to all about you too.

We do so much for so many other people that it’s easy to put yourself on the back burner and then one day wake up look in the mirror and wonder What the--? What happened? Where did time go? Why didn’t I work out (because I can't stand it) or get that facial or massage or take that walk or nap or whatever it was that would have given me the self care I needed to make this trek past the mirror a bit more palatable. Ugh! (aren't I brave to post this unflattering pic?)

I’ve been having quite a few of those "all about me moments" or "what about me moments"and putting my “frivolous” needs aside for the needs of others (now we know for beauty and sanity's sake they are not frivolous). Well, I did a big splurge recently and not without a lot of thought and consideration. I jumped in and got a Clarisonic. I had been wanting one for a long time since I’ve been having problems with creepy little lines (hello 40), odd dry patches and where did you come from pimples.

I saw the Clarisonic in person when I was at Nordstrom the other day while lusting over some handbags but I quickly put it down (along with the bag) saying no way. But then after reading countless testimonials, thinking it over for a week, I ordered one from QVC. Wheeeee!!!

Now after my first try with the cleaning system I could not be happier. Like with handbags I’m a freak for good skincare and I have not been happy with mine lately. After one Clarisonic cleaning I could feel the fresh tingle from the water as it swept across my skin. Just lovely. Ahh.

Of course I now want the baby Mia for my DD. I’m sure she and her teen skin will love it too. But she may have to wait a bit because it be pricy and I thought about mine a loooong time.

I will keep you updated on my Clarisonic progress.

Yay! The QVC set came with 2 extra brushes and 2 full sized cleansers one for the face and one for the body. Sweet!

You can go here to check out Brown Girl Gumbo's view on the Clarisonic Mia.

And here are a couple of videos for your enjoyment. Cheers to self care!










Best,
Kwana

Remembering Mama

I remember the book Mama by Terry McMillan very well and can't believe it was well over 20 years ago that I read and loved it. It was one of those books that really spoke to me in both its style and emotion. With all I'm going through as a writer right now I think I need to revisit it. Check out this interview with the amazing author.



Best,
Kwana

Work Space

What’s Jack up to? Well, you know Jack so no surprise, he’s up to his old tricks. He got sick and threw up the other day. Could it be because the Dear Twins are home and he’s getting into their secret stash of treats from school? He got into the DS’s bookbag and found a bunch of candy while we were out and I came home to candy wrappers all over the floor. I wasn’t happy with Jack or the DS for that one.

Thank you all so much for your support on my Keeping It Real post yesterday. I’m not sure where it will lead but I do appreciate it. Today I’d like to do an update on an old post Visualization where I talked about wanting to add a writing desk to my already tight bedroom. Well, while the Twins were in Paris last week and I had the DH home I decided to move a bit of furniture around. Too bad it was when the DH was trying to take a much longed for nap that I came up with this plan (shrug).


Oh well after much nudging, we moved his chest of drawers over and took the TV off the, could be antique, sewing table that was its stand (yes there is a real sewing machine in here). Then I made the sewing table my desk. Sure it’s itty bitty but works for now until I find another I like. And I quickly put up my little inspiration board. Next up a nice tall skinny shelf for the pile of books and papers to the left that you can't see.
But now to deal with this pesky problem of writer’s block that I’m having. More on that later…


Have a fantastic day!

Best,
Kwana

Keeping It Real

Hello Monday. I hope the weekend treated you well. Mine was fine. Back to the usual running with the Dear Twins and such. Weekends are so busy that Monday mornings seems like a breather. Although I will admit to wasting away much of Saturday on the bed in front of the TV nursing my eye which is a lot better. The DH was kind enough to put the kidlit miles on his car and do all the driving while I held down the home fort. Ahh domestic life.

But all this is not the focus on today’s post. Today I’d like to discuss something I’ve been grappling with a while. The idea of keeping it real and how real can real be on ye old blog. You see something has not been quite sitting right with me.

There are plenty of days when I write a perfectly fine blog post but I glaze over a subject when I’d like to go deeper, be a little sharper, maybe more snarky, not so darn happy and let more of my neurotic self come though. But then that neurotic self takes over and I get to fretting. I start to compare myself to those shiny happy pretty blogs and worry that if I get too real and show my true self or give my real opinions you all won’t come back or you’ll stop reading.


Silly I know. To get to 40 and still worry what others think. What a shame. What waste or time, energy and so precious words.


Besides when I look back on past posts where I am more real and let my feelings show you all have responded so beautifully and shown more of yourselves to me. For that I am grateful.
So what I guess what I’m saying here is it’s time for ye old blog to grow up a bit. Get more real and show more of who I really am. Lord knows when I look in the mirror I see plenty of changes, I might as well express them here too.


Every day is not sunny and every day it does not rain.

Much Love,
Kwana

I’d Like To Thank The Academy…

I’ve been surprised and honored to receive some very kind (though I’m not sure deserved) awards for ye ol’ blog here. On behalf of myself and the Jackster I’d like to give hearty thanks. Uh-oh here comes the ugly cry.

The first was the Over The Top award from Christine from over at The Happily Ever After.
The Over The Top Award is given to blogging friends whose blogs you consider over the top, in a complimentary way, of course. As in, they are "far more than usual or expected; extraordinary."
Now receiving this award tell me I need to go even further to be a little more Over The Top. Look out world I’m coming for ya! Thanks so much Christine. You can visit Christine here.
Before passing this award on I have to complete this little survey. Okay. I’m game.

Your cell phone? Blackberry Storm

Your hair? Hot Mess

Your mother? Wild

Your father? Passed away

Your favorite food? Too many to choose

Your dream last night? Deep

Your favorite drink? coffee

Your dream/goal? To be happy

What room are you in? Bedroom

Your hobby? Reading and Knitting and TV

Your fear? So many

Where do you want to be in 6 years? A multi published author

Where were you last night? home

Something that you aren't? Patient

Muffins? Sometimes

Wish list item? Marc Jacobs Lisa bag.

Where did you grow up? New York City

Last thing you did? Washed Dishes. So glamorous

What are you wearing? Sweater and flamer pj’s

Your TV? old. Really, it has a turn dial.

Your pets? Jack the wonder dog

Friends? sweet

Your life? Complicated

Your mood? Complicated

Missing someone? always

Vehicle? Ford Edge

Something you're not wearing? shoes

Your favorite store? bookstore

Your favorite color? Green sometimes other times,black.

When was the last time you laughed? Hmm… Must get on that.

Last time you cried? Hmmm… sure it won’t be long now.

Your best friend? Loyal

One place that you go to over and over? Bathroom. TMI?

Facebook? 1 x a day. Not a huge fan

Favorite place to eat? Johnny’s on City Island

Now I’m supposed to pass the award to 5 other Over The Top Bloggers. Okay Dokey!
Kate at Babbling about Books

Megan Frampton

Kristen’s Divalicious Blog

Amanda McCabe

Jax’s Artistic Journey

Now the fun doesn’t stop there I received yet another award. Man, you’d think I starred in Precious or at least Avatar and was painted blue with all the awards.

I received a Beautiful Blogger award from Tia at Stoic which is a super cool blog that you really need to check out. Beautiful? Wow. Look at me blushing.

Now of course all things come with a little catch and you have to pay in order to play so here are the rules behind the award:
1. Thank & link to the person that gave you the award
Thanks so much Tia. You really are the fairest of them all. Link here.

2. Pass this award onto 15 bloggers you’ve recently discovered & think are fantastic.
15? I agree with Tia. These folks are not playing around but ok. Check out these cool peeps. Some may be a bit older than the rest but you won’t be sorry. Click away:

Get It Girl Style

West Family Advetures

Laura at the Shorehouse

Architect Design

Chocolate Covered Daydreams

Gossamer Obsessions

Jumping Tandem

Lenorevermore

Literary Rambles

Louise Fury's Blog

Midwestern Malaise

North of 25A

Romance Reading Mom

That's Not My Age

Lifescapes

3. Contact said Blogs & let them know they've won
Uh, don’t they have Google alerts for that? Sigh ok.

4. State 7 things about yourself

Come on. You people must be bored with me by now. Sorry if I repeat myself:
1. I can’t walk in heels. My feet instantly hurt. I wish I could though.
2. I usually have at least one twin pissed at me. Ugh. Parenting sucks.
3. I really love shrimp. Wish I had some right now.
4. I adore a good bath. I’d like a nice hot bath at having a nice plate of shrimp.
5. Throw some pasta with those shrimp and I’d be extra happy
6. Put it all in Italy and make my day. I really want to go there one day.
7. Maybe on a book trip?

Whew. I made it. Thanks for reading and playing along. At least I hope you do. I really am honored to be thought of and so grateful to all of you who stop on my and hang with me every day.

Best,

Kwana

Sad Clown

What am I 12 0r 13? How do I get these things? I have been dealing with a cold for over a week maybe 2 and I woke two days ago with a really red eye. I thought (well hoped) it was my allergies. No doing there. It continued so I went to the eye Dr. to find out I have pink eye. Pink freakin' eye! That and the two big pimples between my eyebrows make me wonder if I'm 12 or something. Ugh.



So that's the reason for the Toulouse-Lautrec artwork today (still keeping with the Paris feel). I'm feeling like a bit of a sad clown out there for all the world to see even though I'd rather hide. Oh and the fact that I'm giving up sugar for Lent (again) does not help my Sad Clown mood or attitude. Speaking of attitude I sure like hers. Love the pants. This was painted over 100 years ago and still they look great. So stylish.




Happy Friday.




Best,
Kwana

Winter in Paris

What’s Jack up to? Oh that Jack is trying my last nerve. Yesterday after a workout with my new Shape Up sneakers I decided to reward myself with a nice bath before continuing with my chores and getting ready for the Dear Twins to come home. Well, I ran my bubble bath, closed the door just about all the way, and went about doing some things when I looked and saw Jack acting squirrely. Tossing and flipping like he was trying to dry himself. Well… sigh… that little stinker had jumped into my bath before I could. Can you believe it? I fixed him and a chased him down and gave him a bath for real. Don’t know what’s more work. One little dog or 16 year old twins.

Yeah, I know, it’s the Teen Twins (but Jack is close). They returned home last night tired and happy to see us (Jack the most). Paris was a love, love, love even in the winter (they had a bit of snow). I'm so happy they are back safe and sound. What a joy for us to send them on this trip and to have them return to us.

I will report more soon. Enjoy your day.

Painting of Paris in the Winter by Antoine Blanchard

Best,
Kwana

Thank Heaven

What's Jack up to? Well he was way too happy in the snow yesterday. Rolling around and having a ball. I just could not muster up the same enthusiasm. Sorry Jack I'm just over it now.

The Dear Twins will be home tonight! I've missed them a lot but it's been a good miss and gone by so fast. Quickly we'll all be back to the grind.
In honor of the twins coming home I leave you with this trailer and clip from Gigi with Leslie Caron one of my all time favorite movies that pays homage to gay Paris!







Best,
Kwana