Wednesday, August 26, 2009

The Impossible Wife

Yes I'm on break and yes, I'm here too. Told you I would be in and out and this bit I just had to put in though you might shrug your shoulders and think, eh. I still think it's blog worthy.. ish.



I just woke up from a dream and felt the need to share it here. Don't think I've shared my odd dreams here before. Hmm..

Well, there I was in small little crafty circle, but in said circle there was only 3 of us. Strange, a down number from my usual 6. One woman was a nubie to the group. A friend and blogger though not much of a commenter here and I don't think a crafter so you won't recognizer her and the other woman who was playing the part of my good friend, lots of you do know her, changed and was not herself but Gwyneth Paltrow. Yep, actress and I can cook chicken and potatoes, Gwyneth in a cool asymmetrical top and no apron and not spill on myself Gwyneth, from this post.


Isn't that strange?


Well, it gets stranger. We were quite dressed up. In a very tiny kitchen. Well a tiny nook of a large kitchen were everything has its place. And everything is French and perfect.
Could that be the influence of reading Julie and Julia? Or could it be my long obsession with getting a Le Creuset pot? Shrug.



Here it gets weirder. We're not even knitting in this odd tiny, organized, pretty, French nook but we're sewing and by hand. Why? I don't know. They are small white projects that fit neatly in our hands. I do know that.



Then Gwyneth's husband walks in and it's not cutie Chris Martin. I know Weird again!




But some out of the 1960's lawyer looking dude. Here I blame the Mad Men influence.

Did I tell you we are all dressed in early 60's style but still could fit for now housewife comfort attire? I did, right.



So... the not Chris Martin hubby ask Gwyneth what style of sewing machine she has because his business associate wants to buy one for his wife and Gwyneth knows all the best things to get as she is PERFECT. Gwyneth rattles off a French named machine that I'm not sure exists but in my dream is top line and very expensive.

And as I'm sewing by hand I'm thinking 2 things.

1. That machine is a boatload of money.
2. It's a piece of crap.
3.Why the hell are we sewing by hand if she has it?
4. My Kenmore machine is just as good!
5. Why is Gwyneth supposedly so perfect?


Ok so a lot more than 2 things. But I don't say anything. I watch as not Chris Martin takes the info back to his associate after he kisses perfect Gwnyeth. Then I suddenly start to despise my Kenmore for not being French and sleek and perfect.



After that it's time for lunch and me and the other blogger/mom leave the tiny nook and follow Dream Gwyneth over to the hugest fridge ever (did I tell you it talks? dream weird). Well in the fridge everything has it's place (I see a theme here). And then Dream Gwyneth teaches us to make the perfect grilled cheese sandwiches with some sort of hunky bread, leafy lettuce and hard, briny, smelly cheese that you had to whack off with a big knife.


Blasphemy! Now you tell me how that is better than a diner grilled cheese with bacon which we all know is God's perfect food?



So themes? Thoughts? Care to analyze? Have at it.



My thoughts. Poor Gwyneth is a just a place holder for what I'm being a bit resentful of at the moment also maybe aspiring to. Order, french cooking, cute rocker/business type hubbies that think I do just everything perfectly and also the ability to fit in tiny little nooks. Yeah, that space was pretty small. Or maybe it was all just a dream and full of crap.




Best,
Kwana




P.S. In defence of Gwyneth. I was hanging out on Goop.com her space on the web after writing this and we really do think alike in some things. She just finished the CLEAN which I'm reading and she have the cutest picture of Prince up there. Swoony. Besides that she likes Jay Z. So there.

15 comments:

T. Anne said...

Kwana. Do not be alarmed. Dreaming of Gwyneth is actually quite normal. Women who dream of her are almost certain to have great success pounce upon them unexpectedly in the near future. The fact your dream included a glorious dish such as the grilled bacon and cheese sandwich is the universes way of offering it's blessing in the consumption of any foods, in any calorie and fat combinations, when said success arises. ;)

Tamstyles said...

man...im sick,,,,,i can smell it.

pve design said...

Why can't I wake up and remember every impossible REM detail and why is it that bacon makes everything perfect? Glad to know I made the dream!
Cheers to dreams!
pve

Pretty Neat Designs said...

I get annoyed by the cooking with no apron thing. Maybe she was in your dream because her blog and constant TV presence makes her seem like someone you actually know. And I agree with pve, bacon makes everything perfect.

Kristen Painter said...

Oh man. That grilled cheese is talking to me...

Deidra said...

What a great dream! I love dreams and I love to pick them apart and figure out what they mean. But I will spare you that because the dream itself is so cool!

T.Allen-Mercado said...

That is quite a dream, all I have to add is that the shoe-in husband was in your dream because, Chris Martin, Gwyn's actual hotter than buffalo tofu husband was in mine! :)

Ina in Alaska said...

grilled ooey-gooey delicious cheese and crispy fried bacon... COME TO MAMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

Joyce said...

I have been thinking grill cheese lately so I'll take mine without bacon please. xoxo

Ads said...

That was a fabulous narrative. And then you showed me the picture of the bacon grilled cheese and I got all distracted. Ummmmm.

Jax Cassidy said...

I noticed you were sewing in your dream. As far as T. Anne's comment, how do you analyze a dream about me being BFFs with The Material Girl?

Anything with bacon is a sure hit for me!

Kwana said...

Thanks T. Anne. Smile;)

Thanks for your comments. I see grilled cheese is a hot button sandwich.

As I said the dream was a direct comments on my need for order in my life. Pile cleanup alert.

Jax how did I know you'd pick up on the sewing aspect? You sky girl you! Though you were not the third in the party. I just know you'd pick that up. Trying to get me to sew with you. Ha!

Laura @ the shorehouse. said...

I was recently dreaming about Orson Welles. So I'm fairly sure there's a shrink's couch somewhere with my name written all over it. :-)

Kwana said...

I'm sure you are perfectly sane Laura;)

AMIT said...

Oh this is nice dream which u had.

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